Edgar Allen Poe, The Raven WilliamBanzai7 Once upon a midnight dreary, while insolvent weak and weary, Over a balance sheet covered in a cloud of debts and loans, While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping, As of some one gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door. `'Tis some visitor,' I muttered, `tapping at my chamber door - Only this, and nothing more.' Ah, distinctly I remember it was in the bleak September, And each despicable creditor wrought its ghost upon the floor. Eagerly I wished the morrow; - vainly I had sought more to borrow From my books surcease of sorrow - sorrow for the abundant days of yore - For the rare and radiant maiden whom the angels named Debts No More - Nameless here for evermore. And the silken sad uncertain rustling of each indentured debt just Thrilled me - filled me with fantastic Chinese junk never bought before; So that now, to still the beating of my heart, I stood repeating `'Tis some banker entreating entrance at my chamber door - My late payments entreating his entrance at my chamber door; - This it is, and nothing more,' Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer, `Sir,' said I, `or Madam, truly your debt forgiveness I implore; But the fact is I was napping, and so gently you came rapping, And so faintly you came tapping, tapping at my chamber door, That I scarce was sure I heard you' - here I opened wide the door; - Darkness there, and nothing more. Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering, fearing, Doubting, dreaming dreams no debt laden mortal ever dared to dream before; But the silence was unbroken, and the darkness gave no token, And the only word there spoken was the whispered word, `Debts No More!' This I whispered, and an echo murmured back the word, `Debts No More!' Merely this and nothing more. Back into the chamber turning, my bankrupt soul within me burning, Soon again I heard a tapping somewhat louder than before. `Surely,' said I, `surely that is something at my window lattice; Let me see then, what thereat is, and this mystery explore - Let my heart be still a moment and this mystery explore; - 'Tis the wind of regretted debts and nothing more!' Open here I flung the shutter, when, with many a flirt and flutter, In there stepped a stately raven of the saintly solvent days of yore. Not the least obeisance made he; not a minute stopped or stayed he; But, with mien of lord or lady, perched above my chamber door - Perched upon a bust of Subprime Croesus just above my chamber door - Perched, and sat, and nothing more. Then this ebony bird beguiling my sad fancy into smiling, By the grave and stern decorum of the counterclaim it wore, `Though thy crest be shorn and shaven, thou,' I said, `art sure no Cramer. Ghastly grim and ancient raven wandering in my open chamber - Tell me what unlordly crime now comes from those Wall Street whores!' Quoth the raven, `Debts No More!' Much I marvelled this ungainly fowl to hear discourse so plainly, Though its answer little meaning - little relevancy bore; For we cannot help agreeing that no solvent human being Ever yet was blessed with seeing bird above his chamber door - Bird or beast above the sculptured bust above his chamber door, With such name as `Debts No More.' But the raven, sitting lonely on the placid bust, spoke only, Those simple words, as if his soul in that one phrase he did outpour. Nothing further then he uttered - not a feather then he fluttered - Till I scarcely more than muttered `Other friends have drowned in debt before - On the morrow he will leave me, as my hopes have flown before.' Then again the bird said, `Debts No More.' Startled at the stillness broken by reply so aptly spoken, `Doubtless,' said I, `what it utters is its only stock and store, Caught from some unhappy master whom financial disaster Followed fast and followed faster till his songs one burden bore - Till the dirges of his hope that melancholy burden bore Of "Debts No More."' But the raven still beguiling all my bankrupt soul to smiling, Straight I wheeled a cushioned seat in front of bird and bust and door; Then, upon the velvet sinking, I betook myself to linking Fancy unto fancy, thinking what this ominous bird of yore - What this grim, ungainly, ghastly, gaunt, and ominous bird of yore Meant in croaking `Debts No More.' This I sat engaged in guessing, but no syllable expressing To the fowl whose fiery eyes now burned into my leveraged core; This and more I sat divining, with my head at ease reclining On the cushion's velvet lining that the lamp-light gloated o'er, But whose velvet violet lining with the lamp-light gloating o'er, She shall press, ah, Debts No More! Then, methought, the air grew denser, perfumed from an unseen censer Swung by JP Morgan's sacred liens whose foot-falls tinkled on the mortgaged floor. `Wretch,' I cried, `thy God hath lent thee - by these angels he has sent thee Respite - respite and nepenthe from thy proposition of Debts No More! Quaff, oh quaff this kind nepenthe, and forget this silliness of Debts No More!' Quoth the raven, `Debts No More.' `Prophet!' said I, `thing of evil! - prophet still, if bird or devil! - Whether tempter sent, or whether tempest tossed thee here ashore, Desolate yet all undaunted, on this debt spoiled land all foreclosure haunted - On this subprime home by horror haunted - tell me truly, I implore - Is there - is there a deficit cancer in Bernanke's brain? - tell me - tell me, I implore!' Quoth the raven, `Debts No More.' `Prophet!' said I, `thing of evil! - prophet still, if bird or devil! By that Heaven that bends above us - by that God we both adore - Tell this lost soul with unpaid debts laden if, within the distant Eden, It shall clasp a sainted maiden whom the angels named Debts No More - Clasp a rare and radiant maiden, whom the angels named Debts No More?' Quoth the raven, `Break Even Forevermore.' `Be that word our sign of parting, bird or fiend!' I shrieked upstarting - `Get thee back into the tempest and the Usurious shore! Leave foreclosure doom as a token of the words thy soul hath spoken! Leave my credit score unbroken! - quit the bust above my door! Take thy beak from out my wallet, and take thy form from off my door!' Quoth the raven, `Debts No More.' And the raven, never flitting, still is sitting, still is sitting On the pallid bust of Subprime Croesus just above my chamber door; And his eyes have all the seeming of a demon's that is screaming, And the lamp-light o'er him streaming throws his shadow on the floor; And my net worth from out that debtless shadow that lies floating on the floor Shall be lifted -nevermore!