"I've Scammed Everywhere"
(I've Been Everywhere, Johnny Cash, Hank Snow)
I was totin' my luggage along the airport security line,
When along came a pinstriped dude with a high Louis V load.
"If you're goin' to Mayfair London, Jack with me and AIG you can ride."
And so I climbed into the jet and then I settled down inside.
He asked me if I'd seen a jet with so much financial contraband to hide.
And he said, "Listen, I've traveled n done every scam in this here bailout land!"
I've bailed everywhere, man.
I've scammed everywhere, man.
Stripped my shareholders bare, man.
I've schtupped the taxpayers yeah, man.
Oooooh derivatives I've done my share, man.
I've scammed everywhere.
I've scammed in:
Reno, Chicago, Fargo, Minnesota,
Buffalo, Toronto, Winslow, Sarasota,
Wichita, Tulsa, Ottawa, Oklahoma,
Tampa, Panama, Mattawa, La Paloma,
Bangor, Baltimore, Salvador, Amarillo,
Tocapillo, Baranquilla, and Perdilla, I'm a killer.
I've been bailed with:
Goldman Sachs, Credit Suisse, RBS, Merrill Lynch,
BAC, JP Morgan, HSBC, CITI, RFC, Danske Bank, Bank of M, SocGen
Dresdner, Deutsche Zentral Genossenchafts, Paloma,
Wachovia, Paribas, see what I mean-a
I've scammed with
Calyon, Credit Agricole, Dresdner Kleinwort, DZ Bank,
KFW, Banco Santander, Landesbank Baden Wuertemmburg,
ING, Barclays, S&C, Citadel, Deutsche Bank, Rabo Bank yeah I've robbed a Bank
Pittsburgh, Parkersburg, Gravelbourg, Colorado,
Ellisburg, Rexburg, Vicksburg, Eldorado,
Larimore, Admore, Haverstraw, Chatanika,
Chaska, Nebraska, Alaska, Opelika,
Baraboo, Waterloo, Kalamazoo, Kansas City,
Sioux City, Cedar City, Dodge City, what a pity.