FAT CAT JAMIE OF JP MORGAN

Fat Cat Jamie of JP Morgan Introduces Himself
(Cat Morgan Introduces Himself, Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats)
WilliamBanzai7's Book of Wall Street Fat Cats

I once was a young Wall Street Pirate what sailed the 'igh seas -
But now I've rehired as CEO extra-ordin-aire:
And that's how you find me a-taking' my ease
And keepin' the revolving door open for rainmakers in fluent high finance-ese.

I'm partial to repackaged debt partridges, likewise to derivative grouse,
And I favour that rich Devonshire bonus cream in a bowl;
But I'm allus content with a bonus drink on Bernanke's 'ouse
And a bit o' rich FED funded fish when I done me patrol.

I ain't got much polish, me manners is gruff,
But I've got a good coat, and I keep meself smart;
And everyone says, and I guess that's enough:
`You can't but like Jamie of JP Morgan, 'e's got a suave 'art.'

I got knocked about on Paulsen's TARP Barbary Coast,
And me voice it ain't no such melliferous horgan;
But yet I can state, and I'm not one to boast,
That some of the gals is dead keen on old Jamie of JP Morgan.

So if you 'ave frisky business with risk free  flavors to savor
I'll give you this tip, and it's worth a lot more:
You'll save yourself time, and you'll spare yourself labour
If jist you make friends with the Magnetar cat in the C Suite of JP Morgan.

JAMIE OF JP MORGAN.