Friday, May 28, 2010


BANZAI7 NEWS--Eager to rehabilitate its image in the eyes of the American public, Wall Street has mobilized to help find a solution to the Deep Water Horizon disaster.

Goldman Squid will send a special team of deepwater divers lead by Lloyd Blankfein and Fabrice Tourre. Squid Team 6 will attempt to clog the runaway well by inserting (junk shoting) shredded ABACUS offering circulars and other worthless junk such as the Fed's Maiden Lane portfolio. JP Morgan Chase has also volunteered to provide shredded rubber tires from its Atlanta tire dump.

If the plan fails, former Lehman CEO Dick Fuld has suggested that BP should sell the well in a REPO 105 Transaction and Fabrice Tourre has said that he thinks he knows how to sell the whole thng to some sophisticated German Banks.

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