Sunday, September 21, 2008

Bernanke's Big Rock Candy Mountains

(to the melody of Big Rock Candy Mountain)
Lyrics By WilliamBanzai7


One evening as the DOW went down and the ABX was burning
Down the track came a banker hiking and he said boys I'm not turning
I'm headin for a land that's far away from Wall Street's crystal towers
So come with me we'll go and see the Bernanke's Big Rock Candy Mountains

In Bernanke's Big Rock Candy Mountains there's a land that's fair and bright
Where the handouts grow from the Bush bailout pros and you sleep sound every night
Where the ABS books are all empty and the sun shines every day
On the birds and the bees and the bonus trees
Where the perrier springs where the squawk box sings
In the Bernanke's Big Rock Candy Mountains

In Bernanke's Big Rock Candy Mountains all the regulators have wooden legs
And the shorts all have rubber teeth and the taxpayers lay golden eggs
The traders books are full of fruit and the bankers play all day
Oh, I'm bound to go where there ain't no snow
Where the rain don't fall and the wind don't blow
In Bernanke's Big Rock Candy Mountains

In Bernanke's Big Rock Candy Mountains you never sell your stocks
And the glimmering streams of origination fees come a-trickling down the rocks
The enforcers have to tip their hats and the bears and shorts are banned
There's a lake of stew and of champagne too
You can sail all around 'em in your custom yachts
In Bernankies Big Rock Candy Mountains

In Bernanke's Rock Candy Mountains white collar jails are made of tin
And you can walk right out again as soon as you are in
There ain't no short handled shovels, no axes saws or picks
I'm a goin to stay where you sleep all day
Where they hung that jerk from Berkshire Hathaway
In Bernanke's Big Rock Candy Mountains

I'll see you all this coming fall in Bernanke's Big Rock Candy Mountains

1 comment:

  1. MONEY FOR NOTHING--RESIDENTIAL MORTGAGE BACKED SECURITIES
    (to the Melody of Money for Nothing by Dire Straits)


    I want my, I want my RTC
    I want my, I want my RTC

    Now look at them yo-yos thats the way you do it
    Shovelin CDOs on CNBC
    That aint workin thats the way you do it
    Money for nothin-- asset backed securities
    Now that aint workin thats the way you do it
    Lemme tell ya them guys aint dumb
    Maybe get a blister on your little finger
    A blister from your Blackberry

    [Chorus]
    We gotta securitize more subprime products
    Custom derivatives--OTC
    We gotta move these toxic tranches
    We gotta screw Moody's, S&P

    See the little maggot in the pinstripes and suspenders
    Yeah buddy that ain't his own hair
    That little maggot got his own jet airplane
    That little maggot hes a Billionaire

    [Chorus]
    We gotta securitize more subprime products
    Custom derivative origination fees
    We gotta move these toxic tranches
    We gotta screw those GSEs

    I shoulda learned about structured products
    I shoulda learned to be a quant
    Look at that mama, she got it stickin in the squawk box
    Man we could have some fun
    And hes up there, whats that? hawaiian noises?
    Hes bangin on the bongoes like Ben Bernanke
    That aint workin thats the way you do it
    Get your money for nothin-- asset backed securities

    [Chorus]
    We gotta securitize more subprime products
    Custom derivatives---S.P.I.V.s
    We gotta move these toxic tranches
    We gotta screw the monos and AIG,

    Listen here, that aint workin thats the way you do it
    Shoveling CDOs on CNBC
    That aint workin thats the way you do it
    Money for nothin--asset backed securities
    Money for nothin--asset backed securities

    I want my, I want my RTC
    I want my, I want my RTC

    (All rights reserved WilliamBanzai7 2008)

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