BANZAI7 NEWS--In an attempt to keep a low profile, The Goldman Sachs Group Inc. has told its employees that it won't be hosting a corporate Christmas party this year.
GOLDMAN GRINCH
(You're a Mean One Mr. Grinch)
WilliamBanzai7
You're a mean bank, Goldman Grinch.
You really add a new dimension to the words "filch and steal".
You're as cuddly as a subprime cactus,
You're as slippery as Bernie the ponzi eel.
Goldman Grinch.
You're a rotten bunch of overpaid Wall Street bananas
And you're apparently just "too big to fail".
You're a monster, Goldman Grinch.
Your heart's a gelt blackhole as big as AIG.
Your brain is full of "ferkakdeh" derivative spiders,
You've got TARP garlic in your "fershtinkiner" souls.
Goldman Grinch.
I wouldn't touch you, with a
thirty-nine-and-a-half foot bailout pole.
You're a vile one, Goldman Grinch.
You have ponzi termites in your trading style.
You have all the tender sincerity of a typical "filching" Wall Street "shnorrer", Goldman Grinch,
Given a choice of liking you, I'd sooner drink bottled Hudson River water!
You're a foul bank, Goldman Grinch.
You're a nest of stinky, swindling pinstriped skunks.
Your underwriting book is full of unwashed schlock
Your soul is full of subprime gunk.
Goldman Grinch.
The three words that best describe you are as follows, and I quote,
"Schlemiel, Schtup, Shtunk"!
You're a rotter, Goldman Grinch.
You're the kings of Wall Street scheming "dreck",
Your heart's a rotten "gefilte" repo splotched with moldy bailout spots, Goldman Grinch,
Your trading book is an appalling dung heap overflowing with the most disgraceful
assortment of quantitative "chazere" rubbish imaginable mangled up in tangled "kishka" knots!
You nauseate me, Goldman Grinch,
You're a nest of nauseous Wall Street "momzers!",
You're a bunch of crooked trading "schlocksters" and you run a vile "shandhoiz", Goldman Grinch,
You're a triple decker synthetic CDO toadstool sandwich with arsenic Wall Street bailout sauce!
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I'm going to have to get a translater of some of those words, but this is excellent work. Spot on, WB7.
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