TIGER: STRAIGHT DOWN THE MIDDLE

FORE!!!

Straight down the middle
He drove it straight down the middle
Then he started to swerve just a wee wee bit
That's when his wife lost sight of him
That Cadillac SUV has never been found to this day
But it went straight down the middle just like they say

Whack down the driveway
She smacked it like in the fairway
Then she started to slice just a smidge off line
It was aimed at his head for two but he bounced just in time
His caddie says long as you're still awake you're okay
Yes she smacked him straight down the middle quite a ways

The moon was never brighter
The greens were never darker
And he was never keener to play
He aimed it straight down the middle
It went zing down the middle
Oh the life of a golfer is not all gloom
There's always the lies to tell in the locker room
And the details can get dicey when you see Rachel Uchitel wrapped in a towel
You can see why it went straight down the middle today

Oh the life of a golfer is not all gloom
Though they charge a hefty fine for hitting hydrants under the Florida moon
But he told his story when wrapped in a towel
That he drove that SUV straight down the middle
Where it wound up is a riddle
But it went straight down the middle thats what they say