IRANIAN SPACE ANIMALS

BANZAI7 NEWS--Iran says it sent a research rocket piloted by live animals into space Wednesday, prompting President Mahmoud I'm-a-Nutjob to hail the country's scientific achievements as "over the edge."

Iran's state-run Press TV said the rocket was crewed by a rat, two turtles, a belly dancing goat and worms. Iranian scientists are frantically attempting to translate communications transmitted by the crew's communications officer Lieutenant Wormura following lift off.

Mr. Nutjob said the research project is "mostly over the very edge of modern technology." He also said Tehran is planning the first orbital Twitter feed from the Iranian animal astronauts.

BOSCO the NASA space monkey was asked for his thoughts on this historic event. NASA scientists are frantically attempting to translate BOSCO's remarks, but it is believed that BOSCO is looking forward to his planned one way trip to Mars.

Iran says the launch involved a Kavoshgar (Explorer) 3 missile, which is capable of carrying a team of belly dancing goats to the moon.