Tuesday, December 1, 2009

SCUM SUCKIN PENCIL NECK BANKER GEEK


FORTUNE--Back two years ago when the mortgage meltdown was heating up, we wrote an article called "Junk Mortgages Under the Microscope" dissecting a particularly wretched mortgage-backed securities issue peddled by Goldman Sachs.

We wanted to show how these complex securities really worked and how Moody's and S&P, the rating agencies, aided and abetted the process by giving two-thirds of an issue backed by ultra-risky second mortgages the same safety rating they gave to U.S. Treasury securities.

We thought this was a cautionary tale -- but it's turned into a horror story. All the tranches of this issue, GSAMP-2006 S3, that were originally rated below AAA have defaulted. Two of the three original AAA -rated tranches (French for "slices") are facing losses of about 90%, and even the "super senior," safer-than-mere-AAA slice is facing losses of 25%. How could this happen?

Read more here:http://money.cnn.com/2009/11/30/real_estate/mortgage_lessons.fortune/index.htm?cnn=yes

Pencil necked thieves!



PENCIL NECK BANKER GEEK
(Pencil Neck Geeks, Freddie Blassy)
WilliamBanzai7

Back when I was a kid, life was going swell.
Till something happened, blew every thing to hell.
That night my daddy stumbled in, all pale and weak,
Said "A woman up the block just gave birth to a banker geek."

Mom said, "Sell it to Greenspan's circus, what the heck."
Dad said, "Nope, this one's a pencil neck.
And if there's one thing lower than a quantitative freak,
It's a grit eatin', scum suckin', pencil neck banker geek."

You see if you take a pencil that won't hold lead,
Looks like a pipe cleaner attached to a head,
Add a buggy whip body with a brain that leaks,
You got yourself a grit eatin', pencil neck banker geek.

(Chorus)
Pencil neck geek, quantitative freak,
Scum suckin', swindler with a lousy physique.
He's a one man, no gut, bubble bloating streak.
Nothin' but a pencil neck banker geek.

Soon the banker geeks were poppin' bubbles all over downtown.
You couldn't hardly sneeze without knockin' one down.
After a nice juicy steak, if you need a toothpick,
Just reach for a banker geek, they'll do the trick.

One day we cut one up for fish bait.
Learned our lesson just a little bit late.
Soon as the geek hit the Hudson drink, the water turned subprime red.
Next day, sure enough, all the investor fish were dead.

Chorus

Most any night you know where I can be found.
Yeah, stomping some banker geek's head into the NYC ground.
So keep the faith 'cause in SPITZER you can trust,
I won't give up 'til the last banker geek bites the dust.

Chorus

They say, "these geeks come a dime a dozen."
I'm lookin' for a guy named Geithner who's supplin' the dimes.
It's gonna be real hard times for all of these
Grit eatin',
Scum suckin',
Obama lickin',
Drop kickin',
Gut grindin',
2 Big 2 failin',
Nail bitin',
Glue sniffin',
Scab pickin',
Butt scratchin',
Bonus snatchin',
Sleezy,
Smelly,
Pepper bellied,
Dirty, lousy, rotten, stinkin', pinstriped bailout suckin freaks.
Nothing but a pencil neck banker geek.

Pencil neck geek.
Pencil neck geek.
Pencil neck geek.

1 comment:

  1. WB7, wow, you have been on a tear. Haven't heard that song in ages, and your rendition is excellent, given the situation.

    ReplyDelete